I am amazed at how many of my friends go after guys and girls who are polar opposites of themselves and then get mad when that person doesn't get their humor or doesn't understand that if you don't pay your bills, your electricity may get turned off.
I have super responsible friends who own homes and have mortgages and pay their bills in full (crazy!) and on time actually write to girls who fully admit to being financially irresponsible. I think they find some charm in this at first with little realization that it will eventually grate their nerves. More than likely, when they are in the middle of watching a movie at her place and the powers gets shut off.
I'm not saying opposites attract. I am the perfect example of such strangeness occurring. I wouldn't say Stew and I are overflowing with things in common and the boy doesn't find me the least bit funny. Which really, when I am standing there dancing around, giddy with my own puns, how can you resist laughing. But if he walks in with an oversized pack of graph paper balancing on his head and says he has a new flying nun hat, I'm supposed to drop to the floor clenching my sides in a fit of hysterics. Umm.... no. But, despite our differences of opinion (mainly on the opinion that I'm funny) we have enough in common to make it work. Actually, it's all a lie. He tolerates (for some reason not yet known to science) what no other man could so that is how it works. Any sane man would have been worn down by now and run away. Maybe he is just as crazy as I am. Hmmm.... there is some food for thought.
What I am saying is everyone has their "sticking points" as to what makes someone girlfriend/boyfriend material. Someone who can't take care of themselves and lets their rent lapse is not the person you want tied to you for the long haul. My friend was wise enough to recognize this in a guy she dated for a bit. He took her out a couple of times and then started talking about how short his check was that week and could they just hang at home. One might let this slide IF the guy did not live at home and didn't have any rent to pay. But once she let it slide with this guy, they never went out again, despite her suggestions of a movie and dinner and despite her offers to treat. So, despite the fact that he turned her on more than any guy she has ever met, she cut him loose.
A friend of mine wrote me the other day. He was having some email banter with a girl he thought "probably too young and dumb" for him. So, he baited her by writing something that was ripe with innuendo and had way too many big words for her. When he showed me what he sent her I told him that she was going to miss that. "Wait," I said, "I think I just heard the plane fly by . . . and was that a honk?"
"Why am i always attracted to the stupid ones?" he asked.
I don't know. If I had the answer to that, do you think I would be home sitting on my unemployed ass trying to create the perfect egg salad? Do you think the highlight of my day would be seeing brown rice sushi at the grocery store? No. I would be self-employed, writing an insane book and charging $100 for it because it can only be found on the net. Oh wait, I guess that means i would have written The System.
Maybe the financially responsible soul seeks someone less responsible because that is how they wish they could be. Or, maybe they do it because they feel like they'll prove useful to that person if they are there to keep her in line or write out a check when her check bounces. Maybe the intelligent guy goes for the dumb girl because he harbors a secret desire that ignorance is bliss or maybe he is lazy and knows he doesn't always have to be smart or funny. Maybe the shy quiet guy goes for the outgoing girl so they don't have to worry about making small talk because she'll do it all.
I just feel bad because I can see my friends getting totally screwed over when they date their opposites. I can see it coming from a mile away.
Maybe I should go into fortune telling.